Before, and After...

This is me in 1998...

And this is me in 2008..!

Only by changing one's heart, can one change their mind,

Only by changing one's mind, can one change their spirit,

And only by changing one's spirit, 

Can one change their life!

Shell xx

A tale of denim woe!

Today Jamie and I went jeans shopping...

We walk into the first shop and Jamie tries on the most beautiful pair in the place.  Comes out, women faint, and gay sales assistants begin looming to talk to him at length about how well they fit, and I stand back with Tara in the pram, who is screaming to get out, has kicked off her shoes...  We pay, we leave.

Second shop.  I take in three different pairs in the largest three sizes when the sales assistant isn't looking because I am sure they won't fit and I want to avoid the embarrassment caused by the question they ask when you come out of the change room; "how did you go?"  And no, it didn't go well.

I don't know why the fashion industry is seemingly not interested in dressing people?  I love fashion.  Love clothes, and fabric and accessaries.  I am a confident woman, but I find shopping for clothes, with curves, sometimes a little unnerving.  

As I have talked about before, I used to be fat.  (I must unearth one of my old photos from ten years ago so you can see.)  I am now a size 14-16.  I still exercise everyday.  I think I look nice.  But every time I go looking for jeans I honestly cannot get the size 18 over my hips and that's just silly!

End of rant.

Luckily, this story has a happy ending.  I walked into Jag and realised I had been the singer at the wedding of the lady who worked in the shop!  We hugged, and giggled, and I told her my tale of denim woe.  She gave me the most beautiful pair in the place to try on...  I came out, women fainted,  and gay sales assistants (probably if there had been any) would have tutted!  Jamie stood back this time, with Tara running around the shop (wearing no shoes) and admired me!  We payed, we left.

Now that I have finished this story I am not quite sure what the moral is?!  

As I stood in Jag today and looked in the mirror at myself, I felt proud.  I was proud of all the mornings I have made the effort to walk up the hill all these years.  Proud of all the chocolate that I have resisted.  And most proud of the health of mind, body and spirit which learning self control brings.  The jeans were a nice reward today.

Shell xx

Tea, and toast

What!?

It seems this is the official 'tea and...' series for the blog this week.  And if it is, then what better addition could there be than tea and toast?  

One of life's simple pleasures is a perfect cup of tea and some beautiful, brownish, seed garnished bread with (my favourite) red raspberry jam!

I had always been a 'white bread' person until recently, when I was handed a steak sandwich on whole meal for lunch by my sister in law.  It was SO good, I vowed then and there to change my ways!  So now I must officially be a grown up if I like the taste of brown bread - I would go so far as to argue that I now enjoy the taste of bread!  Since that white stuff didn't taste like anything compared to this heavenly cape seed loaf fresh from Baker's Delight...  Mmmm.

Speaking of growing up - I wondered if I was the only person on the planet who sometimes looked at themselves in the mirror, and were amazed to see an adult looking back?  I sometimes ask myself; is this still me?  Did I make it?!  Am I not a child anymore..?  And this is precisely why I cannot take myself too seriously in this life!  And nor should anyone who saw my school photos from my posts, here and here a few weeks ago!

I have settled that in many ways I am still a child.  And I think we need to be 'child like' in our lives, not 'childish'.  Playful and sensitive, without the selfishness and thoughtlessness of a child.  To overcome immaturity and embrace the honesty, the laughter, the fun loving and life lovingness of children.  For this is the only way to reach maturity, and stay youthful, in my opinion...

Shell xx

Tea and satisfaction

Is there anything better than the cup of tea you have in the wake of hard work, and a job well done?

I sit here this morning with tea and a sense of such satisfaction having been for an early morning walk...

Which I must confess I didn't feel like doing when I woke up!  I felt a little fuzzy, my head a little heavy - but I put on my jacket and went anyway to find the sun and say good morning to him!

And did he not put on a marvelous welcome..?

When I got home I realised that the days I don't feel like going to see the sun and the trees on the hill, are the days I need them most.  Hard work makes you feel alive!  And makes the pleasure from the cuppa enjoyed afterwards, all the more immense.  

Shell xx

A thousand thank you's!

I received an email last night from a lovely fan who had taken photos of me yesterday at the gig.  I thought I would feature them in today's post...

Love to all on this beautiful morning.

A thousand thank you's to all who were kind enough to show support yesterday!  It was an honor for me!

Shell xx

Living the life!

I sat down to have my breakfast this morning, looked out the window, and realised the rain was turning white!  

As I went outside with my camera, and my ridiculously excited children, I noticed my sister in law across the way, taking photos of the snow from her house as well!  (Note: Kathleen's photo above.)  So I suppose this means snow is not a frequent occurrence in Canberra!  

It was so beautiful I had to go outside in it, stretch out both my arms and embrace the icy perfection falling upon my face, hair and dressing gown!

This gave me inspiration for my gig today, another edition of Coffee & Chords at Gloria Jeans.  There were lots of people there, with big smiles for my songs, and it made me, and my heart, sing!  

Days like this make me feel like the luckiest girl in the world, dancing in snow, singing for friends, living the life!

Viva La Vida!

Shell xx

Into the blog world...

Sincerest apologies for not posting yesterday.

I jumped in the car with my mother & father in law at 6am, they were doing a quick day trip dash to Sydney.  And when I got home late last night I spent the rest of the evening, and early morning watching the opening ceremony.  Wasn't it marvelous!

I am a most un-athletic person, but I absolutely love the Olympics.  I think every Aussie kid does.  It always blows my mind that we have only just over twenty million people in this country and yet we seem to dominate the world of sport.  Not just in the Cricket, but just about everything!  Less winter sports I grant you, but you've just got to love the competitive Aussie spirit no matter what you think of sport.  I have to say, I am not a fan of strange games with balls, and bats or hoops or cheer leaders!?  But I respect athleticism, people who train for their sport everyday, come rain or shine, give it their all, and represent their country.  Mmm!  Props for that!

In other news, this is my 90th post!  It went so fast!  I hope it has been all that I promised it would be in my first post which can be reviewed here.

I hope that my musings about being in a large family, having strong beliefs about how I think we can best fare in this world, my big earrings (!) and musical endeavors have sought to inspire many.  I have learned so much already on this journey into the blog world, and I am utterly addicted many wonderful blogs I have found while being here, written by amazing people, with amazing insights.  Do refer to my blog list on the left hand side of this post.

Well I am to away just for now!  I have a gig tomorrow which I will share all about when I come home.

I am only just getting started on this blog, and I will give you all of my heart, each day, for as long as you will have me.

Shell xx

Rock and a hard place

You've been breezing in and out like windy weather,

I pretend that it's okay,

And we sit there all alone, together,

Trying desperately to think of nothing to say;

Do you ever find, we only seem to hate the ones we love?

Bind them with our toughest chains...

Do you ever find, his body's here, but his heart has been caught,

Between a rock and a hard place.

He's afraid to hear the truth be spoken,

So he stays away from me,

And we rely on the curse, of plastic conversation;

Does he not want the treasures I have for him?

Do you ever find, we only seem to bother hating the ones we love?

Tear them down to save some face!

Do you ever find, we only seem to put the ones we love,

Between a rock and a hear place...

If I tell him no, will he pack his bags and go?

Will I be feeding him to the lion's den?

If I let him stay, pretend everything is okay,

Am I worthy of a mill stone..?

Do you ever find, we only seem to hate the ones we love?

Tear them down to save some face!

Do you ever find, his body's here,

But his heart has been caught

Between a rock and a hard place,

Between a rock and a hard place.

Shell xx

Garden party!

There was a hint of spring in the air today.  And to celebrate, we had afternoon tea out doors in the garden...

Afterwards I went for a walk up the hill, and listened to Feist on my headphones.  I bid good afternoon to every magpie and kangaroo that I saw (!) and as I walked I let the music take my heart on an emotional tour - you know the way you do sometimes?  

I pretend I am in a film, and this is the music in the soundtrack.  I walk, and sometimes dance along, as though the camera is watching my movements.  I mime the words as I explore in the scene.  I must be deeply talented and interesting - or I wouldn't be in this film!

Sometimes I could be Lizzy, from Pride and Prejudice.  Walking along (in cute dress) with a knowing smile at how the world is, and how it perhaps ought to be...

Atop of hill, I play lots of games with myself - I think of song lyrics, and set lists, and shopping lists, and love ones, missed.  I hear the gentle whisper of God's sweet voice, which makes me smile : )

Could this be a recipe for happiness?

Shell xx

This beautiful world...

Shell xx

Campbell Maurice Tully

My handsome son Campbell turned eight today.

So the house has been inundated with toy helicopters, batman merchandise, racing cars, lego - and cousins from all around eager to see the toy helicopters, batman merchandise, racing cars and lego!

The day of celebration is all over now, yet I am still finding bits of chocolate cake and half deflated balloons underfoot.  This makes me smile, because I love birthdays.  I love the cuddles, the presents, the candles, and the traditional birthday song - how often I have sung you...

Campbell is my baby, and my wise old man, all rolled into one!  He loves all of the traditional eight year old things like batman & pocket knives, but he is also a philosopher; he often asks me questions about the world that I had never queried.  He is my part boy, part Legolas, explorer of unknown things, and lands.  An equestrian knight who sometimes wheres a cape, or a hat that looks like it's Robin Hood's...

He is a gentlemen.  And he is just a pleasure to know and love everyday.  

I am exhausted after a day of running around in order to make his birthday something special.  And it has been just that!  A total success!  

As I finally put my feet up I reflect on the knowledge that the celebration is fun, but it's the commitment I have to that boy every day that matters; and hopefully is what he remembers about his childhood in years to come.

I know this magical time of  having young children is fleeting...  so I endeavor to enjoy every day, and every birthday.

Shell xx

Sunday Morning

I love morning; she is the most beautiful time of the day.  I have always had an extra delight for Sunday morning though.  She seems more quiet, more calm.  Maybe because she exudes the spirit of people slowing down a little more, not so many rushing into work.  And maybe through slowing down, more will remember that life is about being alive - about learning to love one another more, and better.

So that is why Sunday is my favourite day!  Also, I get to go to my wonderful Momma's for dinner, church, singing, dancing.  And learning; to love my family and my fellow man, better, and more!

Shell xx

Thinking about New York...

This is Jamie with baby Sean in the pram in central park in 2005...

If you have not been to central park then let me assure you it is every bit as wonderful as 'they' say it is...

...somedays you feel like being in a city, walking around anonymously.  On a hunting expedition for purple shoes...

The travel bug has me wishing I was getting on a plane today...

Shell xx

Tara Grace Tully

Born on a beautiful, sunny Wednesday afternoon.  She was my forth baby, so I felt like I knew what I was doing...  But you cannot believe though, every pregnancy, every labour, every baby is different - and almost like your first again.

The morning of the day she was born, I woke up feeling wonderful, but I was pretty sure this could be 'the day'.  I concealed my painful contractions from the other three children throughout the morning and just did my normal chores.

Decided to go out and have a coffee for morning tea with my mother & sisters in law.  We came home and I tried to have a sandwich for lunch, I had Jamie phoned up at work and told to come home, he only made it by about 15 minutes!  For she was born at 2 in the afternoon, pink and perfect.

I've been lucky enough to have had all four of my babies at home.  With the help of some wonderful Midwives, and our trusted family doctor, and especially my mother in law, my most wonderful support during a hard, but natural thing, birth.  

It has been my choice to birth at home because I thought it was such a natural, private thing.  I know it's not for everyone, and the only thing that actually matters, is that a baby is safe and healthy, and loved.

So my baby girl is two today!

Happy Birthday, hip hooray!

Shell xx